shout-out to that tumblr user that you can’t believe follows you
(via misterskull)
shout-out to that tumblr user that you can’t believe follows you
(via misterskull)
watcha gonna do with all that junk
all that junk inside that trunk
DAT ASS
(Source: sir-ragingbagoftestosterone-esq, via heytheresoda)
Guess who’s going for milkshakes tomorrow if you keep on saying that!Even in Skyrim I can’t get someone to like me
Madison, that doesn’t even make sense
I am aware. I’m getting one then. Oh and maybe…
SCRATCH everything that I said! Nevermind! I’ll just kidnap myself in my own car
nope. still confused
Guess who’s going for milkshakes tomorrow if you keep on saying that!Even in Skyrim I can’t get someone to like me
Madison, that doesn’t even make sense
I am aware. I’m getting one then. Oh and maybe this week definitely next week I can bring you home. My mom was iffy because she isn’t here this week but I might be rebellious by the end of the week
wtf are you even talking about?
Whose home? Am I getting kidnapped? What even?
WHY AM I SO CONFUSED
I think the rush of cute to my body has stopped my heart
(Source: shitssandgiggless, via heytheresoda)
Wayne Brady: 50,072,587,425
Ryan Stiles: 11,113,372,791.5
Colin Mochrie: 3,012,399,040.5
Chip Esten: 2,004,047,000
Greg Proops: 1,001,122,117
Brad Sherwood: 1,071,980.5
Denny Segal: 1,059,560
Karen Maruyama: 1,004,450
Kathy Greenwood: 59,810
Stephen Colbert: 12,000
Kathy Griffin: 5,000
Ian Gomez: 4,000
Jeff Davis: 3,300
Josie Lawrence: 3000
Whoopi Goldberg: 2,500
Patrick Bristow: 1,000
Robin Williams: 1,000
Kathy Kinney: 50The points mattered to someone
(via earlgray-trenchbasterd)
Alternative Star Trek phaser settings (in addition to ‘kill’ and ‘stun’):
- limp
- bit of a cough
- depression
- bad eyesight
- ice-cream van nearby
- sudden interest in botany
- water in ear after swimming
- oven left on at home
(Source: tonofstupidness, via the-night-and-the-storm)
how to do your homework
- you don’t
- now lie back and watch your hopes and dreams go away
(via swnytddobsd)
life is like a box of chocolates
i don’t have a box of chocolates
(via earlgray-trenchbasterd)